I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter - Erika Sánchez
Erika Sanchez portrays a sensibility of what it’s like to be a Latina girl in the American society through 15 year old Julia Reyes - an embodiment of all of us.
Julia is stubborn and gritty and her character conflict lies mainly in her self progressive question, as to where she belongs in the world if not the perfect Mexican daughter? As the book progresses through Julia’s first appearance as the protagonist in a state of mourning to a developing character learning to live without her sister, her relationship and perspective of the world around her becomes a derivative of her inability to live up to her eldest sister's standards. The insufferable identity crisis she undergoes throughout the entire story is not solely significant because us as Latinas burden societal standards of perfectionism, but because the idea of perfectionism is different both inside American and Mexican culture. In the Mexican household, as far as traditionalism stands, perfectionism for women is defined by the desire of men, and unfortunately in most cases, cultures and households, male desire is condoned and perpetuated by women, especially mothers.
“I’d rather live in the streets than be a submissive Mexican wife who spends all day cooking and cleaning.”
- I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L. Sánchez
Sexism, pedophilia and misogyny are not ideas that were developed and supported by Mexico, but they are certainly qualities that bridge between Mexico, America and - the rest of the world. The most dominant theme inside Erika Sanchez’s book, is the tarnished relationship between Julia and the rest of her family due to her refusal to be a participant of the virtuous and dutiful life that is expected of her.
“Once, I went on a rant about the women having to cook all day while the men just sat around, scratching their buts, Ama said I embarrassed her in front of the whole family. That I couldn’t change the way things have always been.”
- I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L. Sánchez
The hostile back and forth arguments between Julia and her mother underline what it is like to be a first generation Mexican-American daughter with ambitions that go beyond household expectations. Julia’s mother has beliefs that are deep-rooted in respect and culture. Julia’s desire to push her education and perspective are deemed as a disobedience and hindrance on the culture. Sexism and gender roles are integral parts of Mexican culture that were issued in the colonial period and Julia’s eagerness to tarnish the status quo of womanhood in a mans society is a very familiar feeling for most of us - who were raised to be seen but not heard.
Julia indirectly laments her sister's life as upholding the family honor. The discredit of Olga’s candor and justness derives from Julia’s jealousy as she analyzes the hybrid societal gap between what a good woman looks like and a bad woman looks like. Family hierarchies are inherently prevalent in LatinX households and the order of the hierarchy between siblings and favoritism is a replica of the more conservative pillars of historic Mexican-American culture.
The comedic and inexplicably raw reality between the parables of Julia Reyes and the 21st century Mexican-American daughter reflects an accurate truth in which the culture’s criticism and insensitiveness transcribes from generation to generation.
However, there are moments of grit and relatableness that Julia and her family can agree upon, such is that to live in the American society as someone who is not an accepted character of the foundation does not mean to obliterate your identity and culture, but to take pride in having belonging in both. For many of us, just like Julia, our identity dilemmas resonate with fitting in to white America without resembling its aesthetic and desire, and to simultaneously live inside our culture knowing we are not grounded to it directly through birth and growth. As Abraham Quintanilla stated in Selena, “We have to be more Mexican than the Mexicans and more American than the Americans, both at the same time! It's exhausting!”
“Ama has never let me say it the English way. She says she’s the one who named me and that people can’t go around changing it for their own convenience.”
- I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L. Sánchez
Julia experiences an identity crisis and an inner conflict between her origin identity roots and who she actually is and where she falls on the honorableness spectrum. The relatableness and complexity of Julia's character and her friends and family exhibit the experience that many first generation children fall into.